Paxo makes gains, Fry falls, on National Treasure Index

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Saturday, 5 February 2011

image for Paxo makes gains, Fry falls, on National Treasure Index

Business news - and there have been spectacular falls on the National Treasures Index today, with Both Stephen Fry and Alan Davies closing down. Both stocks falling a unprecedented 10W (Whiteleys) as a result of off-colour jokes made about the Japanese on a recent episode of Q.I. Fry's stock had already taken a beating earlier in year, after controversial comments he made about birds not enjoying rumpo.

In contrast to Fry, Prince Phillip's stock continues to rise, with ratings agency Privileged and Riches increasing their gaff-rating for the monarch from a modest 'Andy Gray' to a spectacular 'Ron Atkinson'. This comes after Prince Phillip's recent visit to a Kings Lynn paper mill, where he is reported as saying to an employee "stay too long around here and you'll end up with webbed feet!", a comment that was particularly well received in some parts of Suffolk.

There were also strong gains for, Jeremy Paxman (+5Ws), Boris Johnson (+3Ws) and David Attenborough (+12W), all rallying strongly towards the end of the day, but Julie Walters continues to only make modest gains closing a disappointing 1 Whiteley higher than this time last week.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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