Hangover report on the state of Manchester United's feeble attempts to play football in 2014! MANCHESTER EVENING NEWS REPORTS: Blind Captain Moyes (why take Kagawa off and replace him with a one footed parrot?) has hit an iceberg with his sinking Titanic and the first to jump ship are the "Roo & Ro" rats! Where were they? Searching for their amputated injured legs or too busy countin...
NEW YORK CITY - British soccer star Chicharito flew into the Big Apple to have some photos taken for an upcoming poster. The Manchester United player, whose real name is Javier Hernández Balcázar, was asked by Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Ga...
Old Trafford, Manchester: Like the Politburo standing high above, the 'Phantom Raspberry Blower of Old Trafford' strikes again, again and again... Manchester United all in name, keep losing. It has been reported that the 'Phantom Raspberry Blowe...
The red side of Manchester was in turmoil today as Moyes (who?) announced that his Dutch, superstar striker, Robin van Persie, will miss 8 games over the festive period! Thousands of Chinese, Japanese, and other Asian origin Reds were seen stormin...
Wayne Rooney has put in a transfer request and demanded a move away from Man Utd. He gave the following press conference explaining his reasons and here it is: "I am sick to death of playing for a middle of the table club, fed up with doing mar...
CHICAGO - Playguy Magazine has just announced that it has signed British singer Cheryl Cole to appear in it's February Valentine's issue. The men's publication had been trying to get Ms. Cole to agree to do the nude layout spread for a little over...
MILWAUKEE - Little six-year-old Milly Cottondandy had no idea that she would win The Heinz Ketchup Sports Drawing Contest when her mother Leslie told her to draw a picture of a soccer player. Milly, who is a devoted fan of Manchester United and es...
Not content with writing a tell all book revealing all the secrets from Old Trafford, Sir Alcy 'Guinness' Ferguson has agreed a deal to write YET ANOTHER BOOK. After trashing David Beckham, Roy Keane, Rafa Benitez, Steven Gerrard, Wane Rooney and...
Manc'ester Disunited gaffer David Boyes sensationally tried to grab the attention away from retired Alcy 'Guinness' Ferguson today by announcing his own book will be published next week, revealing all the secrets from his first three months at Old Tr...
Newly retired Sir Alec Fergieson has revealed in his new book he turned down the chance to manage England twice but, if asked for a third time, would definitely accept the job... with conditions. Fergie revealed he turned down the chance to replac...
Comedy writers took to their computers in force this weekend to celebrate and mock Manchester United and their terrible form under new gaffer David Moyes. On twitter, @JohnNotTerry mocked up a pic of Moyes selling burgers in his new job. @Football...
The football world was thrown into turmoil for the second time in a week today when a Manchester United fan called a radio phone-in to discuss the clubs bad run of form. After the Roy Hodgson front page 'space monkey' story earlier in the week, ma...
Insiders at Manchester United have secretly conceded the Premier League title for this season - after just eight games. Following defeats to Liverpool at Anfield, West Brom at Old Trafford, and a disappointing home draw with Southampton, United dr...
Following another disappointing result at Old Trafford - the 1-1 draw with Southampton which left United eight points behind leaders Arsenal - new gaffer David Moyes has decided to stop mentioning the 'F' word. After the red devils failed to win a...
NEW YORK CITY - Manchester United's Chicharito has dropped a bombshell and told his girlfriend Cheryl Cole that he is contemplating retiring from the world of soccer. The 25-year-old said that he wants to go into acting and has been encouraged by...
CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - English soccer player Chicharito, whose real name is Javier Hernández-Balcázar and his girlfriend English singer Cheryl Cole were down in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico relaxing in the warm Baja California sun. Chicharito decided...
Stony faced Scot Alan McHansen has officially called time on his glorious decade and a half pundit career on BBC highlights show Match Of The Day. Hansen became known as a reliable defender for Liverpool and Scotland when both teams enjoyed their...
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