Back in Nest City, Kansas the woman who had sat on a commode in the bathroom for two years was back at it again. Nest County Sheriff Brian "Barstool" Whitaker said they got a telephone call from a different guy than last time and the man told the...
In what is sure to become an international incident of astronomical proportions Russian cosmonauts aboard the International Space Station are complaining to their ground crew at the Baikonur Space Control that American astronauts are refusing to let...
Unbeknown to many, the cold war continues in The International Space Station. The original vision of the ISS was one of a place where astronauts would share food and facilities, with other 'nauts' in heavenly bliss. Alas, the Russians and Americans...
LONDON - Located in Westminister's Travelcard Zone 1, the historic landmark, GENTS at the Picadilly Underground Station will close June 1, 2009. Reg Fleming, Station Manager, London Underground said, "rising paper costs, bog brush shortages and t...
Just when astronauts thought that space was the new Woodstock and that they left behind the petty differences and violent conflicts of sad old planet, Earth, toilet turmoil broke out on the Space Station. Apparently it all began with the institution...
German scientists have developed a new strain of their popular super strength laxative. Working at their top secret WASP laboratories they have improved their maximum strength x10. Dietar Von Scheiste, the scientist in charge said "We got the idea...
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - According to my source, secret agent Yskinmien (whose name has been changed for his protection), the toilet torcher has been caught. The toilet torcher has been torturing toilets around the area with explosive diarrhea. He then...
Wilkes Barre, PA-At a rest stop on the Pennsylvania turnpike, a young man tried to conceal his call to nature by coughing in-sync with his flatulence. Christopher Breen, 21, of Glenside Pennsylvania, was traveling north to visit friends at S...
Trouble may be "blowing in the wind" in Malibu, where a couple is accusing their neighbor, Bob Dylan, of permanently parking a stinking portable potty next to their mutual property line. In a letter to the editor published by the Malibu Surfside N...
The British Royal Family's principal toilet in Buckingham Palace has announced its retirement after 50 years'service. In a career that has seen an unparalelled number of royal bottoms and flushed away countless tons of regal turds. The toilet said...
A budget airline is considering charging for the use of the toilets on its flights. Ryanair has said that it may introduce a £1 charge for using the in-flight toilets. They say this will be a standing charge and it will be £2 if you want to be se...
Economy airline Brianair is today counting the cost of its plans to charge passengers to use the toilet on board. The plan-£1 for a piss and £5 for a shit-proved extremely unpopular. Billy Nomates spoke of his shock "I always travel with them bec...
China has condemned what it calls the illegal auction in Paris of two artefacts taken from a Chinese toilet 150 years ago. It has also warned Christie's auction house of unspecified consequences, but which could include standing next to a Chinese...
Parliament this morning authorised a £10 million scheme to fit thrutching bars in all toilet stalls in the house, prompting calls from opposition MPs for the resignation of Gordon Brown and the abolition of slavery. Dave 'do nothing' Cameron decli...
A survey conducted by almost two people, over the last seventeen and a half minutes, has found that the organisation that has done the most to further international hygiene over the last decade has been MuckDonalds. No other organisation has built...
In a recent informal discussion during an elaborate lunch, President Hu Jin Tao, after a huge gin tonic, mentioned that he had received a report related to the problems created by Chinese style toilets. Mr Hu Flungdung said "Apparently it's not t...
A West London poet today unveiled his latest anthology, written entirely on the wall in a public lavatory in Ealing. Ed Ponse, a little known author, claimed to have been inspired to write the prose after a particularly lengthy visit to the loo l...
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