Just when astronauts thought that space was the new Woodstock and that they left behind the petty differences and violent conflicts of sad old planet, Earth, toilet turmoil broke out on the Space Station. Apparently it all began with the institution of pay potties by the Russians during a particularly rough spot in the Soyuz Space budget.
Since the Ruskies were used to waiting on line for everything from potatoes, vodka and Ivans (Soviet Porto potties), no one in their Space pogrom thought that there would be any offence taken by a pay Ivan. WRONG!
American astronauts took great insult at the Russian attempt at bathroom capitalism. None of the US heroes had paid to piss or shelled out to shit accept in the NYC subway which they considered the least civilized place in the Milky way.
The most recent excretion antagonism came from the US refusal to allow a Russian cosmonaut-with diarrhea, mind you to use the facilities-with tragic consequences. NASA officials sought too assure the Russian space program officials that this unfortunate incident had nothing to do with recent Russian aggression. "With our economic meltdown, we need to cut back on every expense, you're in our town now and the facilities are temporarily out of order..."
