Hollywood was in uproar last night after a celebrity plastic surgeon accidentally revealed that the Kardashians have been sharing their fat. Dr Geoffrey Nipantuck from the Beverly Hills Institute of Veterinarians accidently emailed details of the sis...
A billionaire fashion designer says scientists have found a way for him to spend a lot of money on something totally impossible and ridiculous. Bahamas resident Peter Nygard says he is receiving stem cell therapy and that a study from the Univer...
Wilbert Flannery was accused by his family of killing his grandmother so he could inherit her house and money she had hid around the house. After the Williamsburg, Alabama resident was taken in by police, they had to let him go because of lack of...
Instead of the usual greased pig contest at most of the county fairs, we draw a big crowd of locals to see us spot a young stranger around twenty years old, grab him and take him in a building, show him $500, take off his clothes, grease him good and...
New York, NY Donald Trump has announced that he has become a devotee of Scientology, auditing with his solid gold e-meter and expelling body thetans from his hair by the millions. "I absolutely love the Church of Scientology, what with all the c...
Justin Bieber can't stay out of trouble even if he sits on his skinny butt at his house with a girlfriend, according to him. Apparently, guys are having fun at Bieber's expense, going around the area where he lives and playing practical jokes and...
SAN JOSE, Costa Rica - An unemployed banana picker named Joey Caramba has just become the luckiest man in Central America. Caramba was at his home putting some trash in his garbage can. As he took off the trash can lid he noticed two blue bags wer...
BOSTON - Authorities in Boston have reported the arrest of well-known bank president Lars L. Lemoncloud who retired from the Third National Bank of Boston three years ago after a 31 year banking career. Police found Mr. Lemoncloud's fingerprints i...
The Federal Government has privately warned that if any countries should try to call in huge loans, they will quit trading and begin producing that country's legal tender by sophisticated copiers. "A lot of other countries have copied our dollars...
Several cities, because of the lack of donations, have placed after hours ATM Machines at their sperm banks. Now you can go to the blood plasma bank and get some cash and then you go over to the Sperm Bank ATM and who knows how many children we wi...
"That Miley Cyrus showing her rear end and sticking her tongue out and wearing very little is supposed to make her appeal to more teens is a crock. She looks like a little kid first learning that you don't say the word "Poop" around adults...bless he...
Local teen hookers are doing pretty well in this rough economy according to a Pew Research Poll. The Poll taken the last week of December 2013 showed that the average hourly pay for teen hookers is up 12% from the same time last year. "I think t...
In an important publication recently released, it states that an international research expedition to the Southern Ocean has confirmed that if it were left alone, the global climate would be naturally heading towards another ice age. "We're headed...
The bearded and possibly inbred Robertson clan from "Duck Dynasty" signed up for Obamacare this morning with little to no trouble, says a family spokesperson. "It took like twenty minutes tops for the whole family!" said distant second cousin Red...
Shoppers were stopped and interviewed by our blonde, intrepid reporter, and asked one simple question: if you could have anything you wanted from Santa, what would it be? Sarah, a single mother of two, said "Cash". Why cash? "Well, it's small,...
The gains tallied in the economic reports on the Bureau of Economic Analysis are all illusory, says Stanley Morgan. They were all paper gains, and are in no way connected to the self-worth of those whose incomes are above the line that pegs them at...
You'll have to guess several times as this writer gave it my beat shot! Believe it or not, it's hogs. I know you're thinking why so many hogs? Well, for one thing, an average sized hog can bring you $250 if you already have a customer ready to sl...
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