Ace crack reporter, Ace Crackington here, on the streets of the New World Order, trying to find anyone who can tell me what the hell Michaelmas is. “I think it’s a celebration of a guy named Michael who recorded an album in which he played a zombi…
Thanks to top-notch CGI and advanced Deep Fake technology, Michael Jackson is back! Starring in his own hot new TV series with his best buddy, Macaulay Culkin! Mick J. and his boy sidekick, Mack Collie, are "Mick 'n Mack", superheroes! With…
Dundee man Hamish McWhizz shot to internet fame recently after his spectacular moonwalking videos gained popularity on streaming platforms such as Twatch and ImATube. He is now set to perform his dance routine on a nationwide tour, taking in as high…
In news that some will find somewhat offensive, and others might regard as 'uncouth', it's been reported that US president, Donald Trump, scratched his testicles this morning. Trump, whose every move is monitored by the media, then scrutinized and…
Geoff E'hee, 47, of Leeds, is a professional Michael Jackson impersonator. He recently gained modest fame when he joined a protest march in the city to support Black Lives Matter, dressed as the famous singer, but was chased away for wearing a form o…
BILLINGSGATE POST: “I knew a man, Bojangles and he danced for you in worn out shoes.....” Justin Bojangles Trudeau - Has a nice ring to it, huh? Think he ever knew how comforting worn out shoes felt? He wore velvet slippers instead. “Silv...
The Billionaires Of The World Record a Remake Of Micheal Jackson's 'We Are The World'. (A Very Different Version) Mark Zuckerberg had a brainstorm one evening. A fervent brainstorm. One so strong that he called all the other top billionaires in…
NASA officials have, this morning, vigorously denied that the former King of Pop, Michael Jackson, was one of the members of crew on the Apollo 14 mission to land on the Moon in 1971. A spokesman initially said that nothing could be more ridiculou...
A group of Adolf Hitler enthusiasts, angry at the outrageous way the former German Chancellor is always portrayed as some mad, despotic leader with a lunatic streak, have decided to sue anyone who has said anything negative about der Führer for 'defa...
In a tiny, aging building along a busy Mesa, Arizona street, local fortune teller Madam Lisbane finishes a palm reading for one of her regular customers. She tells her that the coming equinox will create unimaginable havoc in her life, and that she m...
Hollywood, Ca - (Ass Mess): A new film about King Michael says he wiped his arse on the criminal justice system and dumped all over the constitution of the United Snakes. Shot on location at an LA propofol factory the hour-long docu-drama examines...
Michael Jackson's legacy maybe not be quite so innocent as the world believes as parents on social media sites are "aping" his infamous act of dangling baby Paris out of a German hotel window many years ago! Modern parents viewing the video and se...
NEVERLAND, CA-The late, not-so-great Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch in Californicate is "for sale" at "only $67 million." For this low, low price, buyers get not only remorse, but also a zoo, complete with llamas; theme park rides allegedly st...
English astronaut, Tim Peake, has just been outside the spaceship to repair a bolt or two, but Houston called both astronauts back in early because Tim, rather a showman, thought he could use the moments to show off his latest dance routine! Tim,...
My friend and neighbor Jacko stopped by the other day and told me that a doctor had just diagnosed him with Alice in Wonderland Syndrome. Now Jacko is so wild and weird that nothing he says or does is too far-fetched for me, but I must admit, I became a little concerned about this diagnosis. "What exactly is Alice in Wonderland Syndrome?" I asked him. "Well it all started with all these horr...
Former NAACP activist Rachel Dolezal has reportedly hired the late Michael Jackson's plastic surgeon, Dr. Avrahim Schwarzgoy, to perform a race-reassignment operation on her. "She's always felt herself to be a black soul-sista trapped in a nerdy w...
Los Olivos, California - Executors marketing Michael Jackson's estate have received a $100m bid for Neverland from reclusive Colorado Springs entrepreneur 'Mr F Racking'. Described by Forbes That's Rich! list as a self-made mover 'n' shaker Racki...
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