William Hague - My Fake Diary

Thursday, 1 December 2011

I'll send the chauffeur to Harrod's cosmetic department today, to get pressies for my personal assistants Lucien and Julian. Better get them early because we might find all three of us working in a hotel room over the holidays, if Abdul, the Syrian terrorist wants another secret meeting.
I think we had a strike yesterday. Must check on that.
Osborne suggested I tried a new drug called Hetrocil Don't know what he means?
Julian and Lucien will join me at the exercising Jim later. Oh, I mean gym!
I had to expel Iranian diplomats this morning.
Iran's threat!