Wayne Rooney - My Fake Diary

Monday, 27 February 2012

Me froat infectiun 'as ment I miss the Holland match fer Inglund.

Lucky really, cause now I cun run both me 'orses un watch um on the day.

Collen, the missus, ain't too boffered abart it eefer.

Me manicurist Zoe said yesterday that I 'ave amazing finger nails. For someone who is not a manual worker.

I misheard her when she said worker, i thought she said wan... never mind. It wus a bit embarrassing.