Richard Madeley - My Fake Diary

Friday, 5 December 2003

im tellin you now it wont be long before i get my own show

i have been puttin in the extra hours outside of work, yer know them nocturnal activities-spendin my nights outside our producers home teachin her how good i am at what i do even if i aint got any clothes on. judy doesnt have a clue what ive been up to, welllll she wouldnt.

the producer was so impressed last night she even rang up some of her friends, they werent really my sort of people covered in tattoos they were, i was a bit surprised when they dragged me off though, while i was being rammed through the bushes i said to one of them 'is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me' turns out it was a gun and i got a good bashing with it.

i hope these bruises heal before the show or i wont be able to sit down....

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