Ray Mears - My Fake Diary

Saturday, 1 November 2008

Lying peacefully in the hammock tonight having a scratch

at me crotch rot.

Just past a full moon. Next thing some old bag on a broomstick starts strafing the camp, flinging toads and batshit at the film crew.

Got her a beauty on the back of the bonce with my faithful throwing boomerang and brought her down sharp and hard. The production crew poked her to death with sharp sticks while I snuffed her black cat by stamping on the little fucker nine times, then barbequed it.