Osama bin Laden - My Fake Diary

Tuesday, 13 January 2009

Dear Diary,

We lost six men and have fourteen wounded after a fierce battle during the middle of the night.

The enemy's losses were just as great.

That's because "We have met the enemy and he is us" as Pogo said.

How many times do I have to tell the men not to clean their weapons near the fire at night? You clean them in the daytime so you do not require a fire to see what you are doing.

Also during the daytime, you will not allow a few bullets to be lost and accidentally kick them into the fire.

Then this would not lead to a fierce battle between you and your fellow troops who are on guard and feel they have been fired upon by the enemy.

Needless to say, my language should not be recorded during this meeting and I could wind up throwing this whole diary in the fire because it is "a tale told by an idiot" to quote another.

Only, in this case, a leader of idiots.

Binny