George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Friday, 3 July 2009

Dear Diary,


I've been considering using a pen name to do my biography.

I told Dick Cheney and he laughed for two minutes over the phone. I thought he was going to have another heart attack.

I don't understand what was so funny about that. Lots of writers use pen names.

What I DID think was funny was Cheney saying, "How about 'Bic'?" Now I understand Bic for a pen name.

The trouble is, where do I begin?

I realize it probably was when I was a kid but I don't think Mom would like for me to put all that down on paper.

Maybe I should ask her. SHE wrote a book about that stupid dog. She could have written about her boys but no, it was the dog.

I never did read it. I hated that dog. Had to follow along behind her and that dog with a poop scoop. Bet I walked a good part of Texas if they straightened it out.

My walking, not the dog poop. But I bet it would have stretched from Dallas to San Antonio.

I still have scars from when that thing bit me. Also from Mom who bit me after I bit the dog back.

Maybe I'll just stick with my presidency. Be safer.

Don't want to get bit.


Previous Dates Next Dates

« Full list of Spoof Celebrity Diaries

Send to a friend

Tell your friends about The Spoof!

Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more