George W. Bush - My Fake Diary

Sunday, 14 December 2008

Dear Diary,

W. Here. I got this call today from the leader of New Zealand wanting me to get started on fighting global warming even before Osama gets here.

No sireee Bob, I said. If President Osama wants to fall for that idiot, Al Gore, let him. Not me.

This New Zealand Prime Minister, John Key, cannot be trusted anyway. He told me it was already tomorrow there in New Zealand.

He's trying one of Cheney's old jokes but I'm wise to those.

So I ask him, "So if it's tomorrow there in New Zealand, see who won the races at Keeneland, who won the daily double?"

Then he acted as if "I" were the one who was nuts. Well, I'm not the one who's claiming they're living in tomorrow.

"Listen to one Screw-Up at a time. That's my motto. He finally hung up after some choice words."

W.