David Beckham - My Fake Diary

Wednesday, 25 May 2011

Ryan Giggs, super injunction, affair, wife, family? I just don't understand.

Today Victoria showed me her axe wound and then she smiled. Its amazing what you can do with pelvic floor exercises.

The's having a baby girl, how can that be, I'm a boy??
That Mel C hasn't been around for years, so it can't be her.
I'll have a maternity test done to find out who the mother is.

And of course, if she's not mine, when she's sweet sixteen, old enough to bleed, old enough to breed and all that.

My laces are loose...

I might fall out of our wheel of love. Victoria, I need you now!!

Dear diary, can it get any better?