When Miriam Moeller slipped a dollar and forty cents into an envelope in her fourth grade Catholic school classroom during a "Pagan Baby Campaign",she fully expected to get a pagan baby in return. She dutifully kept vigil by her mailbox for days. Day...
He fought in the battle of the davenport, captured a whole platoon while scaling the ottoman foot stool and fought the battle of the bulge on twelve-year-old Timmy's bed, but there is one battle venerable action figure G.I. Joe seems destined to lose...
The Obama Administration has something to crow about after a report on the effects of ObamaCare yielded some surprising results. "We are delighted to announce that after spending hundreds of millions of dollars, ObamaCare has made one family in O...
Fort Lauderdale,FL.-A man from California, who survived a freak storm last summer in which great white sharks were swept up in water spouts inside a hurricane and deposited in a flooded area of Los Angeles, wasn't so lucky this time. Fredrick Wha...
Amason.org, the world's largest internet goods purveyor, has announced plans to deliver novels and other books directly to the reader in the quickest manner possible-via intravenous Infusion. Fancy some Proust? Interested in Ivanhoe? "The Dickens", y...
Houston,TX.-The Peoples Republic of China is on track to repeat the greatest hoax of the last century:The Apollo moon landings. The announcement by NASA,the American space agency, comes just days after the communist country released pictures of a toy...
A joint program between the Department of Justice and the country's largest turkey producer has been declared a success following the apprehension of over 250 fugitive turkeys. The arrest of the turkeys is the result of tips phoned into the turkey ho...
Washington,D.C.-You might have to prove whether you're a man or a woman in upcoming elections if a bill now under consideration in the United States Senate passes. The bill requires voters to show proof of their sex in the form of a letter from th...
Victoria Springs,ID- Rodger Franks, the cross-dressing crossing guard beloved by generations of Victoria Springs Idaho school children was found dead in his undergarments just hours after he failed to show up for his afternoon shift in front of Victo...
The same little kid who saved a grateful nation of gamers from the dreaded Video Game Killer has done it again. And this time there's no hiding from fame for now twelve-year-old Gregory Hanes. During a whirlwind tour of the nations top television...
With job season just around the corner, the Labor Department is once again reminding job hunters to respect the rights of private property owners in their pursuit of the perfect job. "In the past we have had incidents where job hunters have gone o...
Washington D.C.-In the wake of the last scandal, the National Security Agency has been forced to admit the failure of yet another one of it's spy programs: The French Shower Cam Initiative. Designed to catch French citizens at their worst-naked an...
McTokyo,Japan-The "Meat Minister" loads two beef patties, a chicken breast, two slices of cheese, three pieces of bacon, lettuce, tomato, and onion onto a classic sesame bun. The "Mega McMiffin" consists of two breakfast sausage patties, cheese, egg,...
From the internet search engine giant, Giggle's recently released self-driving car has sent ripples throughout the automotive and computer industries. Though less than perfect, Napple decided that in order to compete, it had to release it's own versi...
Wazup,Tunisia-It was a common mistake back in the day but for one Al Qaeda operative it was one mistake too many, and he can blame it all on the Millennium. Back then there was great confusion about when the new millennium began, with some celebrating on Dec 31 1999/Jan 1 2000 and others a year later. The smart money people, backed up by astro-physicists, pointed out that There is no year...
The super-fast camera can show a bullet-shaped pulse of light travelling from one end of a laboratory flask to another in a fraction of a second. That might make interesting fodder for Boob-Tube videos,but now they are putting that very same super-fa...
Waffle, NC - As a nod to one of President Obama's most notable achievements,the Obama Administration's decision to change Labor day to Labrador Retriever day, the Democratic National Convention, which starts on Labrador Retriever Day, will begin with...
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