Its carnage, CARNAGE, CARNGE across London this morning as millions of zombies decend onto London's streets. Yes, its true, London Underground have yet again gone on strike and the average commuter has to brave it to the office overground where th...
London's Premier railway station at Waterloo was closed for 2 hours this lunchtime after around 100 desperate and confused London Underground customers went on the rampage. A poster announcing the strike at the Notwork Fail managed station was pla...
Following the discovery of exploding ink cartridges in airports across the developed world, the British Uniformed Liability Limiters have met today at the Secret War Rooms deep underground in Corsham Computer Centre (close to the only 7* hotel with a...
Ashley Cole has released a hasty press release after watching the live coverage of the X Factor. Cole, 29 of a homeless shelter near Chelsea's Surrey training ground has been following his estranged wifes progress on the hit Simon Cowell-founded s...
A contestant on the current series of Masterchef Professionals due to be shown tonight has been exposed as 2 Michellin Tyre owning Apple Von Creampie. Von Creampie, who will be shown being sent home after the first round by resident Sous Wench, Mo...
Shocking news from Her Maj's Police Constabulary this morning reveals that former footballer Paul "Gazza" Crapgroin was pulled over by police while using the latest Sunnyspoons drive-through pub over the weekend. As Mr Crapgroin pulled away from...
A Press Release from prominant Government department the UK Borders Agency has revealed that far from X-Factor hopeful Gamu being deported from the UK, she is currently on leave to appeal over who she really is. The tactfully worded release by the...
News is starting to emerge that Chinese DNS Servers are starting to attract more and more of the worlds Internet traffic in an assault similar to that of the summer. Previously, the Chinese have routed requests to connect to major news websites li...
Take two looks at tonight's live audience on ITV1's first X-Factor Live Finals and you might see a flicker of hope in their eyes. Its not surprising though as Simon Cowell unleashes a new type of audience on the finalists tonight, made up full of...
Auditors representing Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom and its Colonies (PLC) have released a statement overnight saying that they believe that they have found a substantial part of the UK economy deficit after forcing a number of...
National Railway Museum: The British Rail Union has today announced that it has been secretly balloting members for its first anti-strike. An overwhemling majority of 98% of members have voted for the action which involves all railway staff member...
Milton Keynes: A hastily arranged meeting held at the Red Bull Conference facilities in the land of Horizontal and Vertical roads has developed new rules proposed by the FIA for the 2012 Formula 1 season. According to sources at meeting secretly a...
LONDON: The Deputy Prime Minister has apologised on behalf of the Government to members of Parliment by e-mail this afternoon as his last act as Acting Prime Minister ready for David Cameron to return Monday morning. The apology comes after detail...
Two councils on the South Coast have joined forces after hearing of the horrors of the Isle of Wight and have announced that with immediate effect they are closing the borders except for "essential services". The Media Spokesman for both Portsmout...
The singles chart has been forced to amend its rules and introduce fillers into its landmark mainstream pop chart after bowing to pressure from Simon Cowell and allowing songs of just 30 seconds to qualify for chart releases. Cowell, creator of sh...
A sleepy town in Hampshire is reeling at news that their new bus link has been trashed from the Court of Appeal. Hampshire County Council are pressing forward with a new 3 mile bus lane between the towns of Gosport and Fareham but have admitted th...
Now that the Government's independent banking commission is looking at reform in the industry, banking giant HSBC has announced that it intends to increasingly replace £20 Notes with the smaller £5 denomination as it runs down stocks of the banknote...
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