Wayne Rooney - My Fake Diary

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Friday, 28 January 2011

...to work the whole year cleaning piss and puke and makin' beds and stuff, and I get the same money in a week just for runnin' 'round Old Trafford (that's a place in Manchester don't you know) 4 mornings a week and then playin' a match with me mates. Now how brill is that, like?

It's me birthday tomorrow like. According to a journo in the Sun, like, my star sign - whatever that bleedin is - is Moron. He made me realy, really, reaally proud by sayin' that if there was a meetin' of minds like, and mine met, all the other minds wouldn't even notice like. Isn't that nice, or what.

Rite, I must go downstairs and polish the cat as we have some visitors coming round to help me count my money, like.


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