Written by Skoob1999

Monday, 14 March 2011

image for More Misery For Japan As Fukushima Reactor Number Three Explodes, Number Two Critical And Media Coverage Not Helping
The World Next Week - According To The Media. We're All Doomed.

Overnight explosions rocks Fukushima Number Three reactor, Number Two now reported to be 'critical' and radioactive clouds rumoured to headed for the densely populated Tokyo/Yokohama megalopolis.

Fears rise of a secondary deadly quake, another tsunami and nuclear and economic meltdown.

As rescue efforts continue, analysts have slammed the media for stoking up even further panic over an already catastrophic situation.

"It's as if the news media want something else to batter Japan," a local resident angrily declared. "It's like they can't wait for disaster to be heaped on top of catastrophe. Bad news is good news for world media. Now they talk about money, money, money. We know it is going to cost billions to reconstruct - we not stupid - but all we hear is doom and gloom. Media go crazy. They are all bloodthirsty and quite mad."

The reality appears to be that the nuclear problems are manageable, and although not necessarily a good thing, they hardly constitute a doomsday scenario.

So far, the earthquake and subsequent tsunami have been allied in the press with shoals of sardines in Acapulco, elephant aggression in Zimbabwe, Gaddafi's counter offensive in Libya, mood swings in middle aged women in Wolverhampton, flocks of starlings over the Vatican and irregular goldfish behaviour.

Leading FBI Behavioral Scientist, Chuck Brix commented:

"If you have a really shitty day today, for whatever reason, contact the news media and blame it on the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear meltdown - some crazy sensationalist bastard from the media will report it."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
77 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more