Pope Says "Yes" to Gay Marriages

Funny story written by UWGB-Beek

Wednesday, 14 July 2010

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He just can't win.

Pope Benedict XVI announced today that gay marriage is okay.

He is changing the Roman Catholic Church's homophobic stance on gay marriage, and allowing priest to now marry gay couples.

"I looked at what it meant to be a priest, and I realized that I was in a gay marriage with Christ, or so that is how I take the church law to mean," Pope Benedict XVI said.

The break in policy angered a lot of homophobic know-it-alls in the conservative branch of the church. They are fighting the pope on this issue by claiming the pope should read the Bible.

"I am finally doing the right thing, so I don't know why people are getting mad," the pope said.

The church was considering allowing priest to get married, but that was met with too much bickering, so the pope decided to make the change for their silent members of the congregation that were being alienating by such hateful speech.

The old policy basically said that gay people are going to hell. A stance that really didn't fit because a lot of priest where known to be gay too.

"I am not sure this means I can marry my boyfriend, yet," said Father Paul, "but I do believe it means that I now can start hanging out with my boyfriend in public. I don't have to worry about busybodies in my church reporting me the Vatican. I don't report them every time they step out on their husbands and wives."

It isn't clear if the move will really mean anything for most Roman Catholics, but it is a good sign that most congregates won't be looking over their shoulders anymore.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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