The world's first full arse transplant has taken place at a hospital in Arcelona. Over thirty medics worked for twenty four hours to give a new arse to a lucky patient.
The man was thought to have been a former swimming pool cleaner who had suffered serious anal muscle damage after a party. He was left unable to break wind and taking a shit was often a delicate operation. Doctors were able to rebuild his cheek muscles during the operation and the man is now sitting up in bed farting happily.
Doctor Andy Medix, chief bum surgeon at London's famous Rectum Clinic said "This was a very delicate operation carried out by a team of crack surgeons. This is the first full arse transplant. Previous operations had been only partial. We plan to perform a similar operation just as soon as we find a doner with a large enough arse."
If you would like to donate your arse, please pick up a new bum doner card from any GP.