Cannibal in Juarez Says He Was Not Killing Women, He Was Just Eating Mexican Food

Funny story written by Jalapenoman

Thursday, 31 December 2009

image for Cannibal in Juarez Says He Was Not Killing Women, He Was Just Eating Mexican Food
The accused had this packed as "an after dinner snack for my hotel"

A cannibal captured by the Chihuahua state police in Ciudad Juarez, Chihuahua, Mexico says that he should not be charged with murder as he was "just eating a little Mexican food." The alleged diner, named Mbabaloo Mbabababaa from West Africa, was in Juarez on business and works in the import/export trade. The victim was a local prostitute by the name of AnnaMaria Gonzalez Dominguez.

Fingerprint and D.N.A. evidence taken at the scene and from the suspect also link him to similar crimes in Italy, France, Hong Kong, Turkey, and Louisville, Kentucky (United States). His passport also puts him in all of these locations at the time of the murders/cannibalism.

"What can I say for myself but that I have an International palate," asked Mbabaloo. "I go out at night to try a little of the native cuisine and now I find myself in prison."

When asked what made him choose this woman, he said that she was on the menu. "She told me that I could eat her for only twenty bucks, and that sounded like a reasonable price for a meal. I didn't get rice, beans, salsa, or tortillas, but the main course was at least sweet and tender."

Police say that the "dining defense" will not be allowed to stand and that tests of the bodies show "she wasn't really that good...tasted kind of stringy and tough."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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