Rome - (God's Banker Mess): President Obama held economic crisis talks with the Pope today before being granted a private audience at the Vatican's secret entombment of Michael Jackson's remains under the Sistine Chapel.
The singer's body had been smuggled into the hold of Airforce One ahead of Tuesday's empty gold-plated coffin public spectacle in LA.
Secret Service agents also doshed up Pope 'Joe the Plumber' Ratzinger with the usual simony fees for Vatican funerals, believed to be $5 million in gold bullion.
As the casket was lowered into the liquid concrete vault Obama shed a tear before throwing a handful of unidentified white powders over the coffin.
"Lousy Italian coke anyway, Mr President," his Secret Service minder commiserated.
Michelle Obama is three days into cold turkey.
