LONDON -ENGLAND: Having milked the Jade Goody cash cow to death, Master Pimp Max Cash is now upset that Susan Boyle is doing her own Eliza Doolittle - complete with plucked brows, dyed hair, black leather jacket and Burberry scarf.
Unhappy with the new Boyle look Max has complained saying the makeover is a "...major risk because it could jeopardize the phenomenal connection between Boyle and her worldwide audience.."
[Read: I could lose big bucks if the auld cow remakes herself]
He continued: "Keep her as natural as possible for as long as possible. It's more about protection than promotion. She's got the voice. She has to make sure that the person people all around the world fell in love with remains the same."
However, the hypocritical Max has himself undergone a major makeover including a manboob reduction and tons of liposuction. Simon Cowbell said "Max's new face lift makes Rupert Everett look natural".
Max was overheard complaining that Piers Morgan has been moving in on his golden goose so there was a dire need for some overhaul.