UFOs abduct wombats in Australia

Written by F.U. Crusher MD

Thursday, 8 May 2008

image for UFOs abduct wombats in Australia
The UFO seen above the Australian Logies awards just before Mr Sandilands appeared

New evidence from Australia indicates that wombats are being regularly abducted and hybridized with humans.

The mutilation of cattle and abduction of humans has been well documented in the United States. Dead and missing wombats have been found to correspond with UFO sightings near Melbourne.

During the recent Australian television industries "Logies" awards, stars appeared from nowhere and with no apparent reason and some bore a remarkable resemblance to the common wombat.

No one seems to know where Kyle Sandilands came from, but what is not questioned is that he looks remarkably like a wombat.

An expert in wombat behaviour was asked to watch footage of Mr Sandilands at the Logies night and said that "it is unlikely that any earthly animal experimentation committee would have authorized such an experiment".

A New Zealand man who sat next to Mr Sandilands commented that he was apprehensive all night that the wombat-human form would sexually molest him. "I was ready to punch it in the throat if it made a move on me" he said.

This is not the first wombat-human hybrid seen at the Logie awards. A Mr Hinch had previously been compared to a wombat, but experts did not take the claims seriously, nor those made by Mr Hinch about a range of topics.

Scientists at Australia's CSIRO division for Extravagant Claims, Media Releases and Shameless Self Promotion will monitor the situation with the hope that they can waste large amounts of money on it and claim credit for something.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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