China Slams US on Human Rights

Funny story written by tzdan

Sunday, 4 May 2008

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BEIJING, CHINA - China has come down hard on the US, claiming that the superpower continues to commit brutal global human rights violations, all while the international community stands idly by.

"The American juggernaut has little regard for human life," said Chinese Foreign Minister Jhong Kuo in a brief news statement. "From airstrikes on civilian targets, to the deplorable treatment of international prisoners of war, the US continues to deprive human beings of their right to life and liberty. Both internationally and domestically, the United States is one of the great human rights violators of the past decade."

China expressed outrage over two US airstrikes which decimated civilian targets in Iraq and Somalia earlier this week. The incidents were largely buried by the international media.

"Are these not violations of human rights?" asked Kuo.

China is also insistent that the American human rights record is no better domestically than abroad. "The condition of their prisons is deplorable and their treatment of minority groups shameful," added Kuo.

"Can you believe they still practice capital punishment? Savages!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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