Washington Toast - Partnered with starting a war on false information a few miles away, and managing to turn that area of the world into a tinder box, George Bush is making plans to appoint good friend Tony Blair special envoy to oversee Palestinian economic and governing issues. It is believed Mr. Bush has not looked at a map recently, or perhaps thinks Palestinians share his short term memory loss.
"Thanks a whole lot, Cowboy."
"Don't knock it, Bunny. It's a job."
With no personal jet, limousine, budget or expense account for this appointment, Mr. Blair will be flying commercial, presumably carrying his own attaché case, flagging down taxi cabs, staying as a guest at volunteer homes, and helping out with the washing up after supper. Blair's assignment, should he chose to accept it, is definitely iffy, and pretty certain to self-destruct.
Bringing peace to an area where three religions failed, seems quite a stretch for Mr. Blair and his form of incinerating diplomacy. Single-handedly, he has managed to rekindle an 18-year old controversy by awarding Salman Rushdie a knighthood. This was followed by a fatwa against the writer. Thank you very much!
"You should have given me a knighthood."
"Yes, indeed, Sir Cowboy Bush! It has a delightful ring to it."
Offering an MBE honor to lingerie entrepreneur Joseph Corre proved to be another blazing blunder which produced a different kind of firestorm. Mr. Corre rejected the honor calling Blair, "morally corrupt." Thank you again! Corre added that the war in Iraq was deliberately started for economic reasons and not because of WMD, and the consequence of which has thousands suffering intolerably. Not exactly the gracious words, and the free knickers Mr. Blair expected.
"I was available to head the United Nations or the World Bank, and I end up with this assignment as envoy in hell!"
"Wear your good luck shoes, click your heels twice, and maybe you'll end up with a Nobel Peace Prize. Arafat got one. Besides, this job is better than a war crimes trial at the Hague."
"You are too kind."