Great is becoming powerful! She can tell school kids around the world to stay home, or worse, to boycott their schools and teachers and NOT DO THEIR HOMEWORK!!
Probably the worst crime imaginable. Warmongers, drug dealers, white salve traders, and the World Economic Forum are outraged and scared that a 20 year old punkass shitdisturber can wield the kind of power they thought only they could.
She can even get the German cops to hold her perp walk for the photographer to check his lenses and measure the light for the best Time magazine cover shot. Damn, that’s power!
Now, Greta (anagram for ‘great’!) is taking advantage of it. She’s loves the arrest photo ops, will be printing t-shirts, having concerts where she invites Elon Musk to loiter on stage and ask her what he should say, and maybe even a spoken word CD of her speeches and some of her favourite bird calls.
Man, when I was 20 years old … I shoulda pissed off somebody and made a fortune. That’s clearly how you get rich these days – make a stink and smell the money rolling in. Does she get paid? Can I become her gopher – another mocha latte, Ms Thunberg? I have Greenpeace on line two.
Why didn’t my high school guidance counselor help me become all I could be and get a good job, like Greta’s got? Fuck you, Mr. Hernandez, I will so get a better job than the lunch lady!
Greta’s my hero. Keep laughing at those paparazzi “journalists” – a swarm of grown men surrounding a tiny girl, sticking their phallic microphones in her face … they are secretly hot for her … always gotta read between the jumpcuts for the real story.
PS: Where are her parents in all this? My folks hated when I was out past 9pm on a school night, and Great can travel the world on someone’s dime and get arrested and stage sit-ins and fight da power! Stay home and do your homework and marry a nice boy, Greta! She’s clearly not obedient to da man enough!
PPS: The Nobel Peace Prize is next, you know that right? No such thing as bad press …
