China Wets Pants Over Pelosi's Visit To Taiwan

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Saturday, 6 August 2022

image for China Wets Pants Over Pelosi's Visit To Taiwan
"I'd like to get you on a slow boat to China..."

Gee wheeze! Cool it, China. War is no way to promote tourism. So Pelosi visited a neighbor across the bay, gave a speech, received a ribbon or sash, and took off for her next stop.

She didn't land in Taiwan, armed with an AR-17 rifle, taking a few pot shots across the bay at China. Not even verbally. Yes, she did say that the US supports Taiwan's continued independence, but why should that rattle a great big giant like China? Huh?

Without her high heels, Pelosi is about 5 feet 3 inches. The lady is a grandmother of seven. She's a grandmother, for heaven's sake! How many grandmothers visit Taiwan every year? Does China feel threatened by all grandmothers?

What happens if a grandfather visits Taiwan? Double the number of rockets China fires over Japan? Scramble jets? Triple the navel maneuvers in the China sea to prove visits by grandfathers upset you and, "We'll show them!"

Grow up! Take a look around. Half the world knows how to eat with chopsticks. The Great Wall of China is a treasure everyone dreams to walk. Louis Vuitton has its bags made in China. The Three Gorges Dam even slows the rotation of the earth by micro-seconds. And then there's General Tao's fried chicken! Some people even eat it cold for breakfast the next day!

Put your guns and rockets away. Relax! The rest of the world is here to stay. Get a grip. All Pelosi did was say, "Hi!" to Taiwan.

And remember, Pelosi is 5 feet 3 inches, and you are China.

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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