Trying to better his image in the West, Vladimir Putin has released his personal line of men’s cologne.
It’s motto: “Spray it on – you die.”
A scientist who worked on the cologne recipe, and who refuse to be named, fearing for his life, gave us this warning: “Do not buy – you die! That should be motto, but we had to change it to something positive ... or we die. It’s all death with Putin! God, that guy’s so obsessed!”
He wouldn’t say outright, but hinted that sarin gas was used in the cologne formula, which was one of the reasons why so many Germans support Russia and Putin.
A German man who was thinking of buying a bottle (which looks exactly like a handgrenade) said, “Ah, poison gas!” He teared up, sniffled. “Dose were da days, yah?”
