Fly swatting in France can be an explosive hobby!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Monday, 7 September 2020

image for Fly swatting in France can be an explosive hobby!
Swat the irritating bastards, but don't forget to turn the gas off!

(NOT EDITED) Flies are pests, full stop! Maybe not as bad as mosquitoes or gnats, but they are still a damn nuisance! However, a French fly, not a Spanish one (really irritating), got his own back whilst pestering a farmer's wife in her kitchen.

The fly in person had been outside landing on dog's poo, buzzing around cow's eyes, landing gracefully in horse's and cow's dung, and generally doing what flies do; being a filthy nuisance!

After doing its daily rounds of pestering everything it buzzed around, it decided to go domestic, and flew into an open window of a country farm house where the farmers wife was baking lovely fresh croissants! The smell was irresistible!

After buzzing into the kitchen, the farmer's wife decided to exterminate the damn thing with an electric fly swatter! OOPS! Just at that moment she forgot to turn off the gas streaming out of her ancient gas oven ready to bake her croissants. She swatted the damn thing, killing it instantly, but her electric fly swatter swatted a bit too low and hit the gas!

The minor explosion blew her expensive wig off, the exploding croissants were blown out of the kitchen window, and the kitchen wall was left with a huge hole in it! Luckily, the farmer's wife escaped with only minor burns and a bald head! Her husband rushed to the scene only to find his burnt breakfast smouldering in a neighbouring field, a hole in his kitchen wall, and a swarm of flies buzzing around the kitchen searching for a morning snack!

The local fire brigade was informed about a minor blast on a farmhouse caused by an intruding fly, but ignored the emergency call because they thought it was just a massive 'Spoof!'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more