Following its legalisation of cannabis, Canada is to rename itself as a portmanteau of the two words: Cannabisda.
Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, who has recently been focusing a lot on wordplay, said, "uhhhh, yea man, why the hell not, huh?"
"It is pure genius, dude. Combining these two words to make one word...what is it called again? Oh yea, a portmanteau! How cool is that? Mind. Blown."
He also confirmed a change to the national symbol, although it will remain a leaf.
"Aw toats, man, no more maple, the marijuana leaf is our symbol now. Ah, you should have been there yesterday! I was speaking to this guy, and he was like 'cannabis legalised and changing the name of the nation? Is this true though?' And I was like 'what? You just said my name dude', hahahahaha, claaassic."
"He didn't seem to get it like me. In fact, he seemed pretty annoyed. He's obvs not on the wavelength yet. It's difficult, he'll get there, it's all gooood."
"And then just today, my secretary was taking a call when I arrived, and she was like 'oh, actually, stay on the line, he's just in', and I was like 'yea that's my name, but it's Prime Minster to you, ahahahahaaaa," he said.
The press briefing, it has to be said, was light on content and political substance, but there was a pizza delivered from a worker who the Prime Minister was clearly overheard asking 'what you up to after work, man?' He replied 'I'm gonna be drinking bud, toking bud, with my buds', which elicited a hysterically animated laugh from Trudeau. The delivery guy then left after a fist bump and a slight embrace with the Prime Minister.
Early indicators of the effects of legalising the drug show that basically everyone's chilled the fuck out, and far less uptight.
