Putin put out by trumpety Trump

Funny story written by Sir Geoffroy Cockface

Monday, 16 July 2018

image for Putin put out by trumpety Trump
US-Russia relations have never been closer

Vladimir Putin is said to be angry after Donald Trump revealed secret details about their meeting in Helsinki. The two world leaders met in a sauna near Malminkartanohiuppu Park, speaking through a Russian interpreter.

Although no formal declarations about the meeting have been made from either the US or Russian governments, Trump has tweeted details about their conversation. "Putin has a great body. A real manly man!" he tweeted on Monday evening.

Five minutes after that, he tweeted, "Maybe we should think about selling Alaska back to the Russians. I could get a great deal!"

Ten minutes later, he followed it up with, "Putin didn't hack the US election. He promised and I made him pinky swear."

After five more minutes, he rolled back on that comment saying, "Even if Putin did hack the US election, which he didn't, he only did it to help me out. And it worked, if he did it."

Five minutes later, "Putin should sue Obama for letting him hack the election."

Then in the early hours of Tuesday morning, more tweets: "I agreed that Putin should be president of Earth once we get the other countries to agree. Also he is very handsome and he doesn't have any incriminating videos of me."

The Russian president is said to have phoned Trump directly after the series of rambling tweets and warned him not to reveal any more about their 'secret' meeting. What Trump does next is anyone's guess.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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