Written by Jaggedone

Tuesday, 6 February 2018

image for German witches cook their soup with human limbs!
You can't keep a good old medieval Deutsche Hexe down....Jawohl!

The medieval practice of burning witches on the steak (I know how to spell the real one, but I wrote it like this to annoy vegans!), drowning them in the local well, or hanging them outside of castle walls in cages to be pecked alive by blackbirds is coming back to haunt Germany!

Modern day witches in Deutschland have been seen, during carnival parades, dipping humans into huge soup cauldrons to create a sweet and sour broth later to be sold to pissed punters after excess alcohol abuse during this festive period!

One German witch gave an interview to Jaggedone's superstar carnival CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) reporter, Pied Piper-Rattalouis, and here it is:

"Vell rats stink, cats, mouses und dogs, no vay! Ve vill have problems with zose damn vegans! So vat should ve use to make our wunderbare soup? Jawohl, useless scheiss humans of course!"

So there you have it; German witches tortured and Hexe-cuted in German Medieval times now have their revenge in modern times proving history will come back one day and haunt the world; ask ISIS!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
51 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more