Did Emmanuel Macron Invite the Trumps to an Illuminati Ritual in Paris?

Funny story written by TheTempleReptilian

Thursday, 13 July 2017


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A million rumors and conspiracy theories are swirling on Twitter about French President Emmanuel Macron and his connection to Occult Magick. Recently, the feds hacked Facebook and circulated a picture of Macron with his hands making the Illuminati sign.

Soon after, the French media announced that Macron's people had foiled a plot to assassinate him at G20 and in front of Trump, no less. Tragic and devastating enough for you?

How much more sinister can these conspiracy theories get, right?

Well, apparently, everyone's fair game in this brutal and violent Great Meme War that's been unleashed on Twitter and has got everyone scattering like cockroaches when you turn on the light.

But the drama doesn't end there. A couple of days later, hateful warmonger Alex Jones from InfoWars came after Monsieur Macron with all he had and accused him of being a sex toy.

Monsieur Macron, a sex toy? Nah. Alex Jones is just green with envy because Macron is younger, way better looking and much more well mannered and in better shape than him, not to mention that he is the French President.

I'm not even sorry, Alex Jones. Come at me!

Meanwhile, MK Ultra supersoldier-gone-rogue UFO Jesus instantly confronted Monsieur Macron on Twitter to find out why Alex Jones was ripping into him with so much rage and calling him a sex toy.

But the very classy Monsieur Macron didn't take the bait. He behaved like a gentleman and, instead, went to see Indian Prime Minister Narendra Modi to find peace in his heart.

Mr. Modi, being the Hindu guru that he is, took Monsieur Macron on a guided meditation journey to heal his Inner Child and taught him that it is never too late to have a happy childhood.

Then came complications with the so-called victory in Mosul. Many families and children were left homeless and without basic survival needs.

Protests soon surged on Twitter, demanding that the Western Allies do something to help the displaced families in Mosul.

In other words, Monsieur Macron had become an overnight worldwide celebrity and powerful key player in the Paris Climate Agreement.

One thing he wasn't counting on? The insidious haters that come along with online fame. Now the rumor has spread about Monsieur Macron's Illuminati affiliations, and it's been blown so far out of proportion that Macron has become a meme.

How can he save the day and insure that Donald Trump joins the Paris Accord? He invites Trump and his wife Melania to celebrate Bastille Day in France.

Little do the Trumps know that Monsieur Macron's true intentions are to lure them both deep down into the Paris Catacombs for a super-secret Illuminati ritual in which the Trumps will drink blood from an ancient chalice.

Don't ask me how I know, I just know.

So the question now is, what is going to happen after the Trumps hand over the fate of America to the European Union Illuminati? Is the European Union really as ruthless and downright evil as it's claimed to be?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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