'William Vague… You Cannot Be Syrius!' The Letter 'Y' to be removed from the Alphabet.

Funny story written by Mr Anorchristic

Wednesday, 28 August 2013


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for 'William Vague… You Cannot Be Syrius!' The Letter 'Y' to be removed from the Alphabet.
Total Dick Wad William Vague Yesterday.

Once again the world looked on in horror at the humanitarian crisis unfolding in the Middle East, not in Egypt, not in Libya but this time, in Syria. The UK Foreign Secretary William Vague, today made a harsh statement condemning all three countries for having a 'Y' in their names and said that 'we don't know where the 'Y' came from but we will be looking for a UN resolution that any country that has a 'Y' in their names will be invaded by a coalition of western countries which do not have a 'Y' in their names'.

Throughout history, every country which has had a 'Y' in their names has been invaded into extinction and world leaders will be meeting at the Yosemite National Park Summit to discuss just how they will deal with this phenomenon.

With the exception of Germany, who have a 'Y' in their name and suffered a massive defeat in WWII, world leaders will discuss why countries with a 'Y' are on the brink of extinction and what can be done to save them.

For instance, Italy fought on both sides of WWII and still lost the war and now its economy is in ruins and its previous leaders are facing long prison sentences for fraud and underage sex. Norway saw its own massacre recently when a lone gunman bombed and murdered innocent people, Yugoslavia was invaded and saw its own massacres in the 90's, Yemen became the terrorist capital of the world as the harbored Al Qaeda and Bin Laden's Cronies, Turkey, who were never really accepted into the European Union, became the biggest pork manufacturer in the world, not bad going for an Islamic country, Malaysia holds the largest Muslim population in the world and growing! Cyprus saw its economy destroyed by corrupt politicians and banks, Hungary was destroyed by communism and Romanian Gypsies and finally Kenya saw the rise and fall of Idi Amin, who butchered his own people and was never brought to justice by the UN as he was too scary.

The Foreign Secretary said today in a statement from No12 that 'why, oh why, oh why, oh why, do these countries seem to attract trouble and 'why' do we need to do something about the way countries should change their names, if it includes a 'Y'?

Vague went on to say that 'this is an important issue, almost more important to the way these countries are guilty of serious human rights violations such as having a 'Y' in their names. I will ensure that all the force of the UN is brought down on these countries and we will be seeking to remove the letter 'Y' from the alphabet, because it's detrimental to the future of wold peace and I really have nothing better to do.

Top world leading Oxford Dictionary Phrontisteritist, Dr Abcdefghijklm Nopqrstuvwxyz, said today that' we cannot remove the letter 'Y' from the alphabet and that William Vague is a prat and a political minnow and nobody really listens to what he has to say, not even is his wife'.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more