NASHVILLE TN (ABSNN) - Country music songbird Taylor Swift, a young woman not exactly known for having large breasts, poo-poohed "all the fuss about some fuzzy photographs of Kate Middleton sun bathing topless on a French beach."
"I mean, really now... You call those pimples tits? No wonder she's embarrassed; and now everyone else knows that Prince Charming--oh what is his name?--Prince Harry?--no, that isn't right; I mean the good looking one, not the dumb ass from Vegas--well, whoever, he's not exactly a Kennedy is he--but he must be embarrassed for the world to know how flat-chested his new, hootie tootie bride is," she said, all in one breath.
"After all, even I have bigger hooters. I'm also a blonde, most of the time. And I have better legs. My bootie is to die for. More money, and definitely more fans, too," she gushed.
"And I have a Kennedy. Trump that you silly British twit!"
OK, we thought we had a news story when we started.
