Obama Vows to "Teach Arizona a Lesson" Over Immigration Law

Funny story written by Zabdgrov667

Wednesday, 28 April 2010

image for Obama Vows to "Teach Arizona a Lesson" Over Immigration Law
Arizona - soon to be called "the bone-yard state."

WASHINGTON, DC - In response to years of Federal authorities ignoring illegal immigration problems in Arizona, Governor Brewer signed a law making the violation of Federal Law (illegal entry into the United States) into an offense which is enforceable and punished by state law authorities.

In response, the White House has issued a statement saying "Federal law shall only be enforced at the discretion of the Executive Branch; if I say a tax cheat will run the IRS, then that tax cheat will not be punished under Federal law on charges of tax evasion."

President Obama concluded his criticism of Arizona by saying "it's time to teach this bitch a lesson ... you f_ck with this bull, you're going to get the horns."

On the same day, the following statements appeared in public:

"Mainstream" Media: "Arizona NAZI Tea-bagging psychopaths have enacted law to begin the genocidal extermination of non-white human beings world-wide."

Vitaly Gorbachev, Department of Transportation: In solidarity with San Francisco's boycott of Arizona, Federally owned roads are to be restricted through the use of anti-tank mines. Anyone attempting to circumvent boycotts against Arizona will be subject to dismemberment by high explosives, and civil liabilities for resulting craters that impair serviceability of roadways.

Janet Napolitano: In order to protect the US borders, the following regulations are to be implemented immediately - Arizona police officers shall be fitted with remotely activated Shock-Collars, and Arizona police vehicles will, during all operations, have loud-speakers blaring "LA-MIGRA-LA-MIGRA ... PIG ALERT ... I SMELL BACON .... WARN-A-BROTHAH ... BABY-KILLING-NAZIS-IN-THE-HOUSE."

Hillary Clinton (reading from paper): While presidential policy generally prohibits the use of nuclear weapons, Arizona is a member-state of a nuclear power, and therefore may be legitimately be targeted with nuclear strikes by presidential order, where world peace may be threatened by its NAZI extremist agenda.

Ban Ki-moon, UN Secretary-General: UN Peacekeepers from Iran, Syria, and Yemen have been authorized prevent oppression in Arizona by any means necessary. Volunteers have announced that they will gladly embrace martyrdom to exterminate the "Nosey White Devil." The US is expected to provide peacekeepers with "protective vests made entirely of plastic explosives" as partial payment for protection of the "filthy, profane, depraved non-believers."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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