Anchorage, AK; Washington, DC - A team of economists for President Obama crashed this weekend in the high mountains of Alaska, where snowmobiling still is possible in the summer.
A team of rescuers had found the wrecked snowmobile with the team of economists off the edge of a cliff. The economists were all found dead.
Flight and voice recorders were installed in the snowmobile, as part of a pilot project for more surveillance according to the bipartisan program for, yes, more surveillance.
An analysis of these recorders show that the economists were headed for the edge of the cliff, as it was the only option forward. They had actually discovered that they were heading for a cliff so late that any other option would have meant going back.
One of the economists had expressed concern about what they think back in Washington. "What do we say when we are confronted with claims that we are backward-thinking?" Another expressed worries about having to live with having gone back to where they had been before. "That's not forward-thinking. That's reactionary and totally backwards!"
Yet another economist expressed that every other economist would agree that going back is not a viable option, and that action, whatever that action may be, is better than inaction.
The tapes tell us that the team held a unanimous vote, and the result was to go forward, to act, that is, they headed straight off the cliff.
The President was available for comments on the tragic loss of his economist team. The President says it is great that his economists are forward-thinking and prefer action over inaction, no matter how painful that action is. "I am proud of my modern-thinking team of experts!"
When asked what consequences the tragic accident would have, Mr. Obama told The Spoof that the team heroically created jobs for the rescue team and for a new team of economists.
We wanted also to know what could be learnt from the sad news, and what wisdom the new team economists could bring with it in the future.
President Obama said that we can learn that forward-thinking, not backward-thinking, is the way forward, and in fact, creates jobs. Further, action, not inaction, creates jobs.
The President is certain that the new team of economists will take this wisdom with them. "Every economist I have heard of believes this!"
The Spoof will have more on the next fatal accident involving White House officials in Alaska.