Obama signs executive order reversing rotation of the Earth

Written by Tragic Rabbit

Friday, 23 January 2009

image for Obama signs executive order reversing rotation of the Earth
"Yes We Can."

President Barack Obama has signed an executive order ending the easterly rotation of the planet on its axis that has characterized much of these first five billion years of Earth's existence.

The executive order will maintain the current mean angular velocity of 7.2921150 ×10−5 radians per second but will completely reverse the direction. Obama signed the reversal quietly, without the fanfare of executive orders on other subjects earlier in the week.

Reversal of the Earth's rotation requires the use of Very Long Baseline Interferometry coordinated with the Global Positioning System, Satellite laser ranging and other satellite techniques.

Flat Earth and Religious Right groups welcomed the decision while geodetic science teachers criticized the president.

Known as the "Foucault policy," the US presidential stance on the direction of global rotation has been changed again and again by Republican and Democratic presidents since GOP President Ronald Reagan first read about it in 1984.

Democrat Bill Clinton tried to permanently set a westerly direction in 1993, but Republican George W. Bush re-instituted easterly rotation in 2001 as one of his first acts in office.

Next week, President Obama plans to calculate Pi to ten trillion digits, tackle Fermat's Last Theorem for cases other than n=4, and to bring about World Peace.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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