Lindsey Lohan On Her Blog

Funny story written by Bureau

Monday, 8 December 2008

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There's nothing like a Lindsay Lohan MySpace blog entry to brighten our day. It really doesn't have to be about anything, either. But as it went on it got interesting.

Like yesterday, when she blogged that she was too tired to blog after a hard day at the shops and hairdressers and then gave Britney a shout-out. It was just comforting to know that somewhere out there, Lohan is hunched over her computer jamming to B. Spears that can set a young man's heart to pounding.

She then followed up yesterday's quickie post with today's blog, in which she told a little more about her previous day's "Nightmare" outing after the beauty treatment.

"There was this guy on the street who hadn't shaved or showered for months and he has this sign that he was a Vet and asking for money.

"Can you believe this? I told him to get a job taking care of little dogs like Fufu or cats or buffalo. He's probably a drunk and lost his Vet license. So he asks me again for money so I like grab his pan of mostly coins and I throw them in the gutter. Then this dreadful Santa Claus who saw me began following me around and yelling "Ho! Ho! Ho!" and pointing at me and everyone laughed.

"So I ducked into some building called a Library with stinky old books and this woman made a noise like a leaking tire or a flattened fart and she looked like she might be Frankenstein's piece so I get out and catch a cab home.

"How I hate stupid moroned people."

On the surface, the latest rant is Linds stating once again, "I'm with my girl," after a day of the paparazzi-or, as she calls them, "poopystalkers"-questioning her about Sam's whereabouts.

She writes: "they should just stop asking me altogether, once and for all if she and I are broken up because frankly, if we ever ever did.....I would say it before they could even think of asking." In fact, Lindsay says she would probably make the announcement on MySpace.

She then asked someone she called Andy to drive her back to the beauty shop after being chased by that "bad" Santa.

"I can't drive anymore when I'm drinking so I can't drive anymore."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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