Written by rfreed

Sunday, 26 October 2008

image for Poor Banned from Using Money

Today the upper classes of America succeeded in getting a bill passed banning poor people from using money. Having invested heavily in Senators and Legislators for decades they now saw it was time to remove the economy entirely from the lower masses and keep it firmly in their own clenching hands. This essentially made everyone in the U.S. except the upper 2% a slave.

"Money is too good for them." stated Raymond Emory III, a third generation trust funder, "They only spend it on the little things like food and shelter instead of wonderful things like jewelry or fabulous fashions."

"The poor live at such a low level anyway." quipped Ms. Nelly Riva, a photo model who gets paid 20 times her weight daily. "They could just live off what we cast off and live on the edges of town and use our old boxes to build shanties. Let those of us with important jobs like modeling and selling cosmetics have all the money to use properly."

"They have such disgusting taste." said Elmund Mahoney, an interior decorator who specializes in revamping second homes yearly when the owners tire of them. "They eat at fast food joints and buy clothes at thrift stores. All they do is survival level and so functional! How boring!"

The masses of America will essentially be living now from whatever handouts the upper echelon care to trickle down to them. Money will not be one of those things.

"It is too bad we need them to do the dirty work." says Johnathon Richards, builder of mansions for the tremendously wealthy. "The world would be such a cleaner place if we could just exterminate them. Plus imagine all the mansions we could build on the sites of the hovels they now inhabit." he sighs, "But, of course, we would have to get a number of they themselves to do the exterminating. That could get tacky."

Any 'normal' person found possessing money of any sort will be put in a hard labor prison with no possibility of parole. Of course the only difference between this and the plight of the rest of us is that the arrested will be working behind prison walls and we won't.......for the time being anyway.

Economists have stated that this development will benefit the economy, well, theirs anyway.

We tried to talk to a couple of the politicians who were behind the bill. "We don't have to deal with you people anymore." was the only answer we could get from any of them.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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