The Cook County Board of Education realized with a shock this year that many students had no idea at all about how to be gay.
In response to their grave finding, a new school, the 'Barney Frank school for Sensitive Enrichment', is to be opened which will offer various courses, such as:
• Flamboyant Closet Transitions 101
• Clandestine Airport Rendezvous 101
• Congressional Page 101 with lab
• Michael Jackson 101 - The man, the myth, the catamites
Already tapped to teach are Clay 'Playdough' Aiken for musical education, and George Michael on physical education (with plenty of lab-time at the local park).
The curriculum main text is the phenomenally popular "Left Behind" of Congressman Barney Frank.