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Funny story: Jussie Smollett claims he was assaulted by Chicago PD

Jussie Smollett claims he was assaulted by Chicago PD

Chicago, IL - Jussie Smollett, the disgraced ‘Empire’ actor, has now claimed that while he was in Chicago PD custody, he was brutally assaulted and left smelling of hazelnuts. Smollett was released on $100,000.00 bail and immediately related hi...

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Funny story: Freezing Chicago Fireman Hoping for Nice, Warm Neighborhood Fire

Freezing Chicago Fireman Hoping for Nice, Warm Neighborhood Fire

As Minnesota, Wisconsin, and Illinois continue to struggle with the polar vortex cold snap, people are trying to come up with imaginative and often unorthodox ways to stay warm in sub-zero temperatures. A member of the Chicago fire brigade has co...

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Funny story: Obummer's library faces "challenges"

Obummer's library faces "challenges"

WHITEWASHINGTON, DC — The secret design for the Baroque Insane Obummer Unpresidential Libary was approved by the Windy City, officials saying the plans passed the “smell test.” However, the library faces funding challenges. “Nobody wants to pay fo...

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Funny story: Chicago College of Architecture Offers Humor Training

Chicago College of Architecture Offers Humor Training

In a bold move, the revered Illinois Institute of Technology's College of Architecture revealed a new field of specialization: architectural humor. This marks an unusual development on an unlikely campus. IIT was the showplace and professional home o...

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Funny story: Rhymefest Invites Trump To See That Chicago Is Safe, Robbed During Interview

Rhymefest Invites Trump To See That Chicago Is Safe, Robbed During Interview

The Chicago rapper Rhymefest, who invited Donald Trump to his Chicago neighborhood, was robbed multiple times in one day--including while on the air with CNN. Despite being robbed seven times in less than twelve hours, Che "Rhymefest" Smith told C...

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Funny story: Chicago to let Gangs have say in community

Chicago to let Gangs have say in community

The Chicago Organization of Making Chicago a Better Chicago or COMCBC is tired of the rising crime rates. The fight seems to be going nowhere so the COMCBC is trying a different tactic by adopting the old saying, "keep your friends close and your ene...

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Funny story: Obummer promises investigation "by and by"

Obummer promises investigation "by and by"

SECOND CITY -- The Windy City, home to Prezident Obummer and his one-time chief of staff, Mayor-for-Now Rahm Emanuel, is (allegedly) operating a "black site" jail where prisoners are (allegedly) denied their Constitutional rights and are (allegedly)...

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Funny story: Rahm Emanuel: The Windy City doesn't want him any more, either

Rahm Emanuel: The Windy City doesn't want him any more, either

WINDY CITY - Despite the benefits of name recognition, Big Buck$ in campaign funds, and the endorsement of Prezident Obummer, The Windy City's incumbent mayor Rahm Emanuel was unable to secure enough votes to prevent a runoff election with his ch...

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Funny story: Terror at Heathrow Airport

Terror at Heathrow Airport

American insurance salesman James Henry Galbraith thought it was just another tedious return home from the three-week business conference he had attended in London. It wasn't. A Heathrow customs official found a bottle of whiskey in his holdall. "I'm sorry Sir but I have to confiscate this." "Aw... come on buddy. Gimme a break! I always take a bottle home to the wife." "Excuse me." The officia...

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Funny story: Thousands gather in Chicago to watch live twitter news feed of USA vs Belgium World Cup game

Thousands gather in Chicago to watch live twitter news feed of USA vs Belgium World Cup game

They travelled from all over the state to gather in Chicago town square. Draped in red, white and blue flags, these US team football fans stared up to watch the big screen in the centre of the square. On the giant TV was a live twitter news feed pa...

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Funny story: A College Report States That The American Middle Class Is Shrinking

A College Report States That The American Middle Class Is Shrinking

CHICAGO - Recent studies which were conducted at Chicago's Windy City Community College have revealed that the American middle class is shrinking. Dr. Uriah H. Tillerwell, who has a Masters Degree in Statistical Stats and a Ph.D. in Crop Rotation,...

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Funny story: Chicago Woman Sues Politicians Over Her Dead Husbands 15 Votes

Chicago Woman Sues Politicians Over Her Dead Husbands 15 Votes

According to poll records Henry "Harry" Adcock voted 15 times in 15 different precincts the last Presidential election but not only was this illegal, it is especially illegal when Harry has been dead for ten years. "Someone inside sent me a messag...

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Funny story: Chef Chang to open Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! on St. Patrick's Day

Chef Chang to open Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! on St. Patrick's Day

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS - Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! will open in Chicago on St. Patrick's Day. Famous restauranteur, Chef Chip Chang, explained the theme of his newest Chicago restaurant, "It will be all about pork: pork chops, pork rolls, pork roasts, pork...

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Funny story: Bravo Launches "Real Housewives Of Low Income Housing"

Bravo Launches "Real Housewives Of Low Income Housing"

Bravo spokesman Andy Cohen announced today that the reality based, network heavy weight will be launching another housewives reality show in the fall of 2014. "The Real Housewives of Public Housing" will be based on the south side of Chicago in t...

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Funny story: Chicago Bans Dart Boards In All Drinking Establishments

Chicago Bans Dart Boards In All Drinking Establishments

CHICAGO - The Chicago City Council has just issued a city mandate that will prohibit all drinking establishments including bars, lounges, clubs, and cantinas within the city limits from having a dart board on the premises. The CCC took this measur...

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Funny story: Chicago Water Supply In Jeopardy... Republicans Push For Another Bail Out

Chicago Water Supply In Jeopardy... Republicans Push For Another Bail Out

CHICAGO, IL - Scientists have determined that Lake Michigan will soon be empty due to erosion of Niagara Falls. Chicago currently gets 83% of their water from Lake Michigan. Congressional Democrats have proposed spending $136T to "regulate" the ou...

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Funny story: Whole Foods Go Ghetto

Whole Foods Go Ghetto

On Wednesday, a manufacturer of "Whole Foods" announced that it plans to build a store in the poorest and most dangerous section of Chicago. The Englewood neighborhood, 10 miles south of downtown, experienced a 40% increase in homicides last year...

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