John McCain not Manchurian Candidate

Funny story written by Sarl Cagan

Wednesday, 8 October 2008

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In an attempt to dispel persistent rumors, an anonymous source within the McCain campaign today released a statement denying the belief-- long held in many quarters-- that Vietnamese POW camps were used extensively for joint Soviet/Chinese experiments in brainwashing techniques.

It needs to be stressed that there is no solid evidence that Arizona Senator and US Presidential candidate John McCain is now or has ever been a "sleeper agent", driven by deep programming to seek the highest of political offices before being activated to his true mission when given the proper key phrase.

It also must be noted that the fact that the relative unknown Alaskan governor Sarah Palin hails from the closest state to Russia (led by "former" KGB official Vladimir Putin) and their ally China in no way should be taken to imply that Palin is in fact McCain's handler, despite the perception of many that Palin is perfectly unqualified for the office of Vice President. Only the most paranoid would find significance in the fact that "Palin" is only two letters off from "Putin", or-- for that matter-- the fact that the word "comrade" translates into English as "my friend".

So set aside your unpatriotic questioning of our dear leader and war hero John McCain and allow him to lead our glorious proletariat victory over the bourgeoisie capitalists who have brought about this great economic crisis in our honorable motherland!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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