John McCain Blog: Britney Spears Comeback Like Iraq Victory

Funny story written by Ed E. Druckman

Friday, 12 September 2008

image for John McCain Blog: Britney Spears Comeback Like Iraq Victory

(Washington, D.C.) First, John McCain blogged about waiting on line to get his new iPhone. Then, he gave a thumbs-up to Miley Cyrus' album "Breakout". And now the Republican Presidential candidate has posted a new blog stating "if you want to see what victory will look like in Iraq, look no further than Britney Spears' performance at the 2008 VMAs." The question to be asked, with this blog history and the choice of Sarah Palin as his Vice Presidential running mate, is he truly a maverick?

McCain was quick to qualify his analogy. "I don't mean to demean by that comparison the incredible commitment and sacrifice of our troops or Ms. Spears' incredible voice not to mention her gams. But it's time for a little straight talk. Not since I saw Ann Margret at a USO show have I been so impressed."

McCain believes that Spears, her 2007 VMA performance was both panned and seen by many as her obituary, and the U.S. involvement is Iraq, seen by many Democrats as a lost cause prior the U.S. troop surge, have "proven that not only am I keenly aware of foreign policy, but I know talent when I see it, and Ms. Spears overflows with it in the most firm yet alabaster way imaginable."

The Republican Presidential nominee then went on to offer Spears some advice. "With her winning those moommen, I just know every producer is coming to her saying 'yo, we have to get your tracks back to dropping in the clubs.' Maybe I'm showing my age, but I don't want to hear another party smash no matter how slice it is. Why not fuse a little techno with some hip-hop? Now I know my esteemed opponent will say 'active citizenship means letting the people choose', to that I reply 'Where were you when we were talking troop surge, Nephew?'"

Democratic Presidential nominee, Barack Obama, was quick to respond in his own blog. "John McCain would have you believe that he actually watched the 2008 VMAs. Well, Tivo doesn't count. LOL, I crack myself up. I stayed up for them, and I can tell you that no one was more elated and proud to share the title of 'American' with Britney Spears than me, seeing her perform as she did and winning those trophies. Brava Brit!"

Britney Spears has refused repeated Associated Press calls asking for comment on the latest McCain-Obama exchange. However, in a related note, investigative reporter, Bob Woodward, will be publishing an expose on the entire matter in two days.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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