The President's Ultimate Sacrifice: No Golf!

Funny story written by John Andreini

Wednesday, 14 May 2008

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Washington, D.C. - In a move that has sent shockwaves around the globe, President George Bush told the media that he has given up golfing in tribute to the brave men and women fighting in Iraq and Afghanistan. The astonishing selflessness of the President's action brought tears to the eyes of even the most jaded journalists.

"I started balling like a baby when I heard the president's statement," said Bill Boredim from the AP. "I've reported on wars, natural disasters, but this was without a doubt the most emotional moment of my career."

This reflected the sentiments of others who heard the news. Nancy Mindlass, a veteran FOX news reporter, said she wished she could have given Bush a hug. "I can't even find the words to express my gratitude to the Commander and Chief of this country for this amazing sacrifice, and I make my living with words."

First Lady Laura Bush was especially moved by her husband's courageous commitment. "He has always loved golf so much. This was truly a very, very difficult decision for him to make. I am so proud of that man."

Grateful messages from around the world began pouring into the White House as the news spread of the Bush's announcement. Professional golfers will wear black armbands at tournaments to show their solidarity with the president, and all golf flags across the nation will fly at half-mast.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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