Kermit the frog's assassin Slain in Police garage

Funny story written by Zander Kaufman

Wednesday, 5 May 2004

An earlier report made to the spoof, told of the tragic events following an early morning parade in honor of the Muppets creator Jim Hanson. where In which Kermit the Frog, probably best known as Hanson's favorite creation was gunned down on the motorcade route. He was pronounced dead forty five minutes later.

New details lead to the arrest of the infamous "Cookie Monster". There are new facts that led the Police to believe the act was due to a self-adherent rage against the now late Kermit the Frog. Apparently the assailant was holding back for many year's. "He just couldn't stand it, the Frog got all the close up‘s, the Frog always got the lead roles, and every Christmas what do kids get? A Frog toy: so he had to act", said Chief Kirby of the sesame street police.

A week following the arrest, the Cookie Monster was being moved from the jail to the court house. When out of nowhere Jack Gardner, a best boy grip, peeled from the corner of the Police garage and shot the assailant. The cookie monster was rushed to the local hospital were doctors tried their best to revive him, but it was too late.

Gardner, distraught, told the Spoof in an inclusive phone interview that he only wanted to spare Miss Piggy from testifying. He then stated that there is no link between himself and the Cookie Monster. However, this reporter has come to believe that there may have been more than one shooter.

We have come into documents that show the Cookie Monster had exchanged several calls with Oscar the grouch the night before the shooting. But only time will tell what truly happened that morning.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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