Benefit Starved Americans Converting to Iraqi Citizenship

Funny story written by drugtestallpoliticians

Sunday, 1 July 2007

HogWashingdung D.C. - Americans in increasing numbers are packing up and leaving the United States and heading off to Iraq in order to cash in on benefits no longer available to them at home.

The American people are sick of a disintegrating infrastructure at home as well as a lack of affordable medical services and benefits and the fact that 5% of Americans now command 95% of the wealth. The middle class has all but disappeared and the truly wealthy are not happy owning just a mere 95% of all of the available wealth.

In Iraq they get free medical care paid for by American tax dollars as well as free college education and other benefits the same way that Iraqi citizens do.

Americans are also now aware that members of the Bushie dynasty have found billions of American dollars and gold hidden in Iraq by the former regime and have transferred this wealth to offshore bank accounts where it falls outside of the scrutiny of tax collectors and there is a giant treasure hunt underway. They also are collecting ancient artifacts and art looted from Iraqi museums and are selling these objects on computerized auction sites and elsewhere. The only people not entitled to this are American soldiers who are punished severely if caught trying to cash in on the loot. Indeed under the current administration soldiers and veteran's have had their benefits and pay cut and their pay checks are always late so they are losing their homes to foreclosure proceedings so the only people getting rich in Iraq are private contractors, American politicians, American corporations, and other private entities.

Next week we will examine the rising number of Americans heading to Mexico to fill the void left behind by millions of Mexicans who have taken over American's jobs at slave wages. Americans are expected to consume uninspected and tainted Mexican products while at the same time not being allowed to consume perfectly good American pharmaceuticals being sold in Canada at dirt cheap prices because this would cut into the monstrous profits being enjoyed by America's drug companies.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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