Written by Sal Manella

Thursday, 7 June 2007

image for Spongebob Squarepants Presidential Bid Threatened by Campaign Finance Scandal
Squarepants waves to supporters in Bikini Bottom

Presidential candidate and television star Spongebob Squarepants has reportedly been implicated in a campaign finance scandal, according to an official with the Justice Department.

The scandal is said to involve a number of excessive contributions to the Squarepants campaign by restaurant tycoon Eugene Krabs, proprietor of the Krusty Krab.

Krabs reportedly donated some 20 million dollars to the Spongebob Squarepants campaign allegedly for a promise to deregulate the restaurant industry. "What this means", said Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Rodham Clinton, "is fewer health inspections and more sickness so Krabs and his rich friends can get even richer."

Squarepants refused to comment on the allegations, other than to say that he has done nothing illegal and that the entire incident will be handled by his chief legal counsel, Patrick Star.

Sal Manella

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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