Recent news of a shark apparently reproducing without a mate has sent pangs of fear throughout the legal profession as lawyers anticipate being overrun with even more lawyers than now lurk in every locale in America.
"This is horrible", said attorney A. Lance Chaser, of the American Federation of Personal Injury Lawyers or AFPIL. "We will be eaten alive by all of this competition. They smell blood and believe me when a lawyer smells blood, he or she comes swimming to the scene in order to feast on the misery."
John Edwards, successful attorney and Democratic Vice Presidential candidate in 2004 stated that he will do everything in his power to prevent what he termed "this unnatural proliferation of sharks."